Dear Depression.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Photos Taken By Me Thank You Beck For Allowing Me To Take Your Photo.

Dear Depression,

I’d introduce myself to you but I am pretty sure we know each other well enough, sure your not actively in my life anymore but as a teenager you seemed to be my only friend.

If I didn’t want to eat you wouldn’t force me, if I wanted to sleep you would sleep next to me, if I cried you would sit with me, if I wanted to die you would discuss the possibilities of how, if I cut you would tell me how deep, if I’d burn you’d control how long, if I was confused you would tell me how, if I got high you would make me numb, if I got drunk you’d be the burn I felt in my stomach and throat.

Yes it’s true you seemed like the only friend I had even though everything you dragged me through was essentially bad.

Though I’m older and more adult than before I still struggle with you at times and fall on the floor, and like you always do your dark embrace cuddles me there. I realise that being friends with you is something that I really shouldn’t reap.
Unfortunately though sometimes you swallow me hole and again I feel the emotions i felt once before.
When I was a 14-year-old girl trying to embrace the world, this time it’s different though I know the way you work so for a while I may fall under your demise but I promise you this old friend I will not fall within the abyss.

I will not let you take my hands, I will get up when you want me to sleep again, I will eat the food on my plate and this time I will keep it down and not vomit it up to lose some weight.
My skin is far too delicate to cut or burn so put that lighter and razor down there is no need to feel the burn.
I don’t need someone to cry with for I have true friends that cry with me and take my hands, they listen to me and comfort me too but they don’t have the harsh intentions, that was only you.

Depression you see it is time for me to say Goodbye to you, You may of succeed when it came to other people’s battles but for me you won’t do.

If your or someone you know is suffering with Depression please contact Beyond Blue on – 1300 22 4636

Freak Show & Bohemian Themed Photo Shoot.

Behind theĀ scenesĀ of the Freak Show shoot.

Yesterday at 4 pm I finished editing my first actual legit 2 photo shoots, the theme for the 2 photo shoots were Ā Freak Show where I had to take photos of a really creepy and dark but fantastic clown and two beautiful Bohemian hair styled girls.
The girls were all made up and had their hair done by the TAFE student hairdressers and we were paired to a hairdresser and her model.
Once that was done we were to talk with our client and get an idea of what they wanted there photos to look like making sure that the hair was the main focus in the picture.
We were also given our own brief and assessment on what we had to do when taking the photos – we were to pick 8-12 photos of the best shots we took, edit the photos to the best of our ability and present the photos to the hairdresser clients on a CD disk.

For my first shoot I was paired with Kate her model’s name was Nova and her theme was Freak Show, I spoke with her and got an idea of what she wanted.
Kate wanted the pictures to be creepy and dark but also putĀ emphasis on the hair style she had performed.
I remember first meeting Nova, she was all done up in her outfit and her hair and make up had been done, I remember thinking to myself holy shit she looked creepy but also thinking how cool and amazing her photos were going to look and doubted myself that i could do the photos justice.
When it came time to shoot I was very nervous but as soon as I started shooting I didn’t stop, something came over me and I just got into some sort of zone and focused only on taking the photos and what angles I should shoot them from to get the best possible picture.
Nova absolutely worked the camera like she had been a professional model her whole life, her body was so flexible and bent to every creepy angle and curve it could, she made my job almost too easy.

Here are the photos of the shoot.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

It was an experience I will never forget and I am in love with how good the photos came out and couldn’t be anymore proud of myself.

After the Freak Show themed photo shoot came the Bohemian themed shoot, this shoot couldn’t be anymore different to the Freak Show shoot.
The two lovely girls I photographed were named Indie and Victoria (Indie first and Victoria second.) Their stylist names were Jordia and Chelsea.
The photo shoot was taken in a studio setting with glamour lighting, the girls looked beautiful and elegant and again I feared I wouldn’t be ableĀ to do their photos any justice.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Once again I was delighted with how the photos turned out after I had gone through them, picked the best ones and done some slight editing to the photos to emphasis the hair.

The best thing I learnt from this shoot was that it is okay to doubt yourself, hell it might even be a great thing because in the end you just might surprise yourself.

Thank you to Kate, Nova, Indie, Victoria, Jordia and Chelsea for trusting me to take these photos for them, allowing me to write a blog about the experience and giving consent for me to share there photos I took of them with you all.

Until next week – Rach. ā¤

 

Life Is Stunning In Black & White.

_MG_3002

I don’t think I have mentioned this before in any of my other blogs as most of my blogs that i have are based on my writing but I am and have been an aspiring Photographer from the beginning of the year.
Whilst battling with my panic and mental health issues last year i was referred to a mental health program for young people, there they help you define your goals and help you to live independently whilst living with a mental health condition.
If you have trouble with getting to appointments or need support to be somewhere they will come and pick you up and take you to the places you need to be and stay with you if need be.
Whilst diving into my goals and passions I realised that I had always had a love and flare for photography but hadn’t really ever given it a proper shot.
One of my support workers owned a professional camera and offered to take me out for supports to take photos and learn how to use a professional camera properly.
I remember holding that camera for the first time and thinking to myself “Omg I love this, I can actually see myself doing this as a career!”
Every support I went to I was always taking photos and started to make a portfolio of the progress I had made.
As days and weeks went by my medication started to work and kick in and taking photos became a daily occurrence for me, it was also giving me a reason to wake up in the morning and to be excited about.
I knew TAFE courses were going to commence soon and I was getting really sick of not doing anything with my life so I looked up some photography courses that were taking place at my local TAFE and I applied for the Diploma Of Photo-Imagining.
My beautiful Mother brought me a Cannon 500D DSLR camera for Christmas, God bless that beautiful woman and I was ready to go!

Above Is a photo I took at Swansea Caves Beach that I really love and would love to share with you, let me know what you guys think and if you like these type of blogs.

Until then, – Rach. ā¤