Lately i have so many unanswered questions about life, relationships and the need to always want someone.
Being in a relationship for 5 years has really caused me to feel like being independent is a massive struggle. Not having someone to sleep next to at night or someone to go to with all my problems or suggestions or just generally not having the feeling of someone liking you back is really just keeping me down. I think i go to the people i am closest to for the need of love hoping they will feel something for me just because the need to feel loved and secure is so strong! Even though i know that for me to succeed in life is to become independent and to not need a man or woman in my life so much so that if i did have one and the relationship went sour my life wouldn’t come crashing down beneath my feet like my last relationship did.
So whilst struggling through my problem i was on Facebook and was scrolling down in my newsfeed as we all do and saw this picture that i have posted above. There is something comforting i found wrapped within the words of the picture that really made me stop and think the reason that people are politely rejecting my offer to be there girlfriend is because they know that the time isn’t right for me and because i am wanting them for all the wrong reasons. Yes something may be there for us in the future but i am really not ready in myself to be in a relationship again. I NEED to learn to love myself and to find comfort in me before i date again, i just really wish i knew how to do it.. How do you be independent when you crave such comfort in the love and support of another? Something puzzling that i am having problems with this week.